I don't want to miss what He's saying...

Well, plans have changed, after all that, the hospital dropped my contract. Yeah, I know, crazy huh!?! Well, I'm not sure what all this means, but I do know that I am okay with it all. I was talking with my dear friend and she made me think about all this in a different light (which is one reason I love her so very much). She said Sarah look at it this way, maybe you did make the decision to travel as a way to escape, a way to get away, but now, seeing that you made the decision to lay in the bed you created so to say, you chose to go to hunstville, ready to work, the whole time keeping a good attitude and heart about the situation. You trusted God to make the best out of it, no matter whether you were there because He wanted you to be or because you made the decision on your own, you chose to learn from this experience, and move on. Now, after you have gone through all this to even get there, then to get there and to have the hospital drop the contract, maybe its grace that caused that to happen, maybe this has been a trial to test your character, and to me it seems you have passed the test, now I don't know what has been going on in your heart the past few days, but it seems to me that you have remained happy, and joyful during the entire adventure, it seems your heart has been in the right place, so as far as I can tell, you've passed. So, don't be so quick to say you missed God altogether, maybe you did, maybe you didn't, but look at it from this angle, maybe it was a trial, a test of your trust in God, a test of your ability to completely surrender your will, and desires, and to see your own decision through to the end no matter what. So, maybe you've done a wise thing, and good thing, don't be so quick to run out at try something else, take time to really pray, and seek out what you're supposed to do now, so next time you'll know, you'll know its God moving you and not yourself. Trust Him, you know how! So, with that all in mind, and my mind swirling with thoughts, possibilities, options, responsibilities, obligations, and countless other things, my life is once again where it was, at a cross roads, a fork in the road...more like an octopus... with decisions to be made and paths to be trod. I'm stunned at the mercy of God and am so glad it is Him in charge and not me for I would not be quite as patient as Him. So until the adventure begins again, or until some other revelation presents itself, I will say farewell. God bless and Love to you all.

Its Official

Well, its a week late, but I'm offical, I am offically going to Hunstville, AL to work as a travel agency nurse in a small hospital in Madison county. I start Tuesday night, I move into my apartment on Monday as soon as I get all the specs and things. WOW, what new adventures lay ahead for me. Some rather amazing things have taken place in my life since I decided to do this traveling thing, I'm so excited about these new adventures, I don't want to miss out on any part of any of them. Well, I had a revelation the last couple of days, and I've come to realise the importance of living for the moment, in that very day. I know the Word instructs us to not worry about tomorrow, for it has worries of its own, but how many of us really do that. I thought I was living for the moment, living each day...and you know what, that is the furthest thing from the truth that there is. I have no other way of explaining this except for that it seems now as I am looking back-hindsight always being 20/20- that I have been living each day according to its consequence for my future, meaning each day somehow related to where I thought I was supposed to be or where I was supposed to be going, and so instead of enjoying a day simply as a new day from My Saviour, it was another day that brought me closer to the end, closer to my future...or so I thought, becaused in all acutallity, I haven't been living at all, I've simply been exsisting, simply floating through daily routines not expecting or experiencing anything new. It wasn't until last night talking to a dear friend of mine that she said something that triggered this all in my mind....I have been in a desert place unlike any I have ever been in before....its like I simply just dissappeared from exsistance...I haven't been social or even really friendly for a very long time...and she said something to me that made me realise I had become a hermit, and it hit me all at once....I have, I have taken myself away from everything so as to not have to face the truth of what has been going on in the inside of me...the changes that God is trying to cause to be, the new me that HE is causing to awaken and arise within me....I'm not sure what all is going to happen, I'm not sure who I may be in the end, but I do know that with My Saviour in charge I have nothing to worry about. He will cause it to all unfold, and I am going to do my best to continue to daily live every day to its fullest....I don't want to ever just exsist again...I love living, I love life, I love My Jesus and I am so glad HE is ever patient and ever faithful. This last week and a half has been I think the best of my life so far, and yes something really awesome happened, but more importantly....I found me. I found the one who resides within the walls of this skin, I found the real me, the one I knew was missing, but had no idea where to find, the me that I have been hiding, the me I have been scared to be....simply just the woman of God has created, and knowing that, know that HE, the God of the universe, created me, and placed me here on this planet and this time, astounds me, and I so glad that now I can freely live, wholly and completely HIS, experiencing all that HE has instore for me....I am so ready for this newness....I am so excited that even that word seems pathetic to describe what I am feeling. So thank you my dear friend, and thank you Jesus, because without you, none of this would have ever happened. You are awesome, and I love you with all of my heart.